Holiday Party Reruns

Holiday Party Reruns

Strip Info

Title
Holiday Party Reruns
Date
December 15, 2018
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Holiday Party – Friday Night

Dressed in festive holiday gear, Egg and Toast hold drinks and mingle. Toast is telling the punchline of a joke. Egg smiles.

Toast
…And that’s when I realized …the cat was really a dog!
Panel 2 : Int. Holiday Party – Saturday Night

Another party. Different holiday gear. Different friend. Same joke.

Toast
…And that’s when I realized …the cat was really a dog!

Egg’s smile fades.

Panel 3 : Int. Holiday Party – Sunday Night

You guessed it. Egg has had enough.

Toast
…And that’s when I realized-
Egg
(interrupting)
-the cat was really a dog.
Panel 4 : Ext. Sidewalk – Later

Egg and Toast walk home down a snowy lane. They hold hands.

Egg
We need to get you new jokes.
Toast
…Or go to fewer holiday parties.

A Good Fwump

A Good Fwump

Strip Info

Title
A Good Fwump
Date
December 3, 2018
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Void – Day

Egg lies on the ground in the fetal position. A shell-shocked (get it?) look on it’s face.

Whenever I’m feeling anxious and overwhelmed…
Panel 2 : Int. Void – Continuous

Toast walks in. Stands over Egg with a look of concern.

I know I can count on you…
Panel 3 : Int. Void – Continuous

Toast flops face-down over Egg. Covering it. “Fwump!”

…To lie on top of me like a weirdo.
Panel 4 : Int. Void – Continuous

Toast just lays there. A heart floats up from Egg.

Sliding Doors

Sliding Doors

Strip Info

Title
Sliding Doors
Date
November 16, 2018
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Ext. Wal-Maht – Day

Kevin steps up to the sliding glass doors of a Wal-Maht.

Ever since I was a kid, I’ve loved automatic sliding doors.
Panel 2 : Ext. Wal-Maht – Continuous

Extreme close-up on Kevin’s eyes.

I still pretend I’m opening them with my mind.
Panel 3 : Ext. Tatooine – Dusk

[Fantasy] Kevin, dressed in Jedi garb, waves his hand to open the sliding glass doors.

…like a Jedi
Panel 4 : Int. Wal-Maht – Continuous

Kevin strides confidently past a Greeter.

Greeter
Welcome to Wal-
Kevin
(interrupting)
To the sock section, my Padawan!

When You Can’t Take A Compliment

When You Can’t Take A Compliment

Strip Info

Title
When You Can’t Take A Compliment
Date
October 15, 2018
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Ext. Jersey Home – Evening

Bradley Cooper leans out from the window of his black SUV.

Bradley Cooper
Hey…
Panel 2 : Ext. Jersey Home – Continuous

Near the front gate, Kevin turns around. Interest peaked.

Panel 3 : Ext. Jersey Home – Continuous

Cooper’s eyes twinkle.

Bradley Cooper
I just wanted to take another look at you.
Panel 4 : Ext. Jersey Home – Continuous

Kevin’s face contorts into the worst “pretty ugly” smile imaginable.

The Hogwarts Sorting Hat Is A Jerk

The Hogwarts Sorting Hat Is A Jerk

Strip Info

Title
The Hogwarts Sorting Hat Is A Jerk
Date
August 31, 2018
Tags
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Notes

This comic is a perennial favorite. Every couple of months, a Harry Potter themed Instagram account will post it. Then all the others will too. People love the Harry Potter, what can I say?

Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Hogwarts – Night

A new Hogwarts student smiles as the Sorting Hat proclaims his house.

Sorting Hat
Gryffindor!
Panel 2 : Int. Hogwarts – Moments Later

Same thing. But with a different student.

Sorting Hat
Hufflepuff!
Panel 3 : Int. Hogwarts – Moments Later

Same thing. Only this time with Kevin.

Sorting Hat
Only saw the movies! Never read the books!
Panel 4 : Ext. Hogwarts – Moments Later

Surrounded by new students, Dumbledore banishes Kevin from Hogwarts. Kevin, shoulders slumped, walks away.

Relationship Pie Chart

Relationship Pie Chart

Strip Info

Title
Relationship Pie Chart
Date
August 27, 2018
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Void – Whenever
Time Spent In A Relationship

A large pie chart, divided up into three slices. Two of them, very slim (about 5% each), are labeled “Eating” and “Cuddling.” A third, overwhelmingly large slice (about 90%), is labeled “Holding Up Your Phone & Saying ‘Look At This’.”

Not Why Women Carry Purses

Not Why Women Carry Purses

Strip Info

Title
Not Why Women Carry Purses
Date
August 20, 2018
Tags
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Notes

This comic was based on a bit we did in a Weird Couples video for BuzzFeed. Justin & Elizabeth played it so well, I tried to turn it into a comic. It kinda works.

Transcript

Panel 1 : Ext. Void – Day

Man and Woman are walking. Man, ginger smile on his face, holds up his sunglasses and gestures toward Woman’s purse.

Man
Hey babe – Can I stash these in your bag?
Panel 2 : Ext. Void – Continuous

Man puts his keys into Woman’s bag.

Man
And these?
Panel 3 : Ext. Void – Continuous

And his wallet.

Man
And this?
Panel 4 : Int. Void – Continuous

And his phone.

Man
And this?
Panel 5 : Int. Void – Continuous

And a case of beer.

Man
And these?
Panel 6 : Int. Void – Continuous

Unburdened, Man walks away, blowing a kiss to Woman – who stands hunched over by the weight of her bag.

Man
Thanks, babe!

A Little Potty Humor

A Little Potty Humor

Strip Info

Title
A Little Potty Humor
Date
August 3, 2018
Tags
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Notes

This is a redraw of the original comic. You can still see the old one on my Instagram. I was experimenting with my character design. It turned out real cringy. This one’s much better.

Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Bathroom – Day

Kevin brings a small Succulent plant into the bathroom.

Kevin
I bought a plant to liven up my bathroom!
Panel 2 : Int. Bathroom – Continuous

Kevin places the Succulent on the tank of the toilet.

Kevin
There you go, little buddy. Enjoy!
Panel 3 : Int. Bathroom – Continuous

Kevin exits. Leaving the Succulent alone with the Toothbrush Mug.

Panel 4 : Int. Bathroom – Continuous

The Toothbrush Mug speaks to the Succlent.

Toothbrush Mug
Hope you like breathing poo gas, kid.

At The Gym

At The Gym

Strip Info

Title
At The Gym
Date
July 20, 2018
Tags
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Transcript

Panel 1 : Int. Gym – Day
Other People Working Out

A handsome, fit man sits at a lat pulldown machine. Smile on his face, he pulls down the bar at a moderate weight.

Panel 2 : Int. Gym – Later
Me, A Peak Athlete

Kevin struggles at the same machine with much less weight. His face contorts and his legs kick up in protest.

Pale At The Beach

Pale At The Beach

Strip Info

Title
Pale At The Beach
Date
July 9, 2018
Tags
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Notes

This comic was reposted on 9Gag’s Instagram. It got 1.9 million likes. Which gave me the validation I needed to keep making comics.

Transcript

Panel 1 : Ext. Beach – Day

Kevin walks out onto a crowded beach on a sunny day. Wearing black trunks, a black shirt, and black sunglasses with a towel slung around his shoulder, he looks around non-challantly.

Panel 2 : Ext. Beach – Continuous

Kevin starts to take off his shirt. Revealing his white belly.

Panel 3 : Int. Beach – Continuous

The sun reflects off Kevin’s white belly so hard, he becomes a supernova. The white-hot blast incerates the people closest too him. Further away, folks scream, shielding their eyes from the bright flash. Birds drop from the sky. One guy’s face starts to melt off.